Well, hey y’all!!
It feels wonderful to be back with all of you in this Fear Not the Journey blog space! A lot of you have reached out and asked if I have stepped away from blogging and the answer is, no. I love blogging, I love the connectivity we find in spoken and written words. See, what had happened was (LOL!), I have been working to build and maintain consistency with Bloggers & Friends Podcast which ended up occupying most of my time and attention, but, moving forward in the spirit of balance, one of my goals for 2023 is to maintain both spaces with the same consistency and presence.
So here we are, and I am super excited to bring this conversation to Fear Not the Journey because it has been brewing, bubbling, and steaming for more than a year all over Beyonce’s internet. I mean, it’s only right for me to chime in and give my two cents on the hot topic. Right? So, pull up with your tea cups friends, we are talking about the “Soft era” and “soft living”. You can’t scroll on social media without coming across a hashtag, a video, or a post where women are sharing how they’re coming into this stage of life for themselves.
Soft living is a movement primarily among Black women; an act of resistance, a reclaiming of self. It has become the healing journey, the course correction, and the path to liberation for many. It is the space that we allow ourselves to lean into our femininity, and welcome ease and peace into our lives.
It’s about:
Establishing healthy relationships
Being intentional with yourself
Allowing yourself to be gentle and vulnerable
Bringing balance to your life
Creating and maintaining overall wellness
Many of us are raised to take care of others, to protect others, to endure, to grind, to hustle….we are taught that we have to work 3 times as hard in order to be successful, to be strong despite the trauma…to suck it up and tough it out…..all while carrying the soul and potential of the nation forward on our back. It is exhausting. Raise your hand if you feel me!
The soft life mindset relieves women of carrying the burden of other’s expectations of who we should be, or who our experiences have molded us to be. If you are on this journey and it feels challenging, the good news is you are not alone. This is a constant work in progress for me and so many other women, but it’s what I desire for myself and I will continue to rely on my village to support in lifting me into softness.
There is definitely no shortage of content, blogs, and media write ups on this topic. There are a variety of ways people are pursuing this life for themselves and we all have to give ourselves grace on this journey and understand that everyone is at different spaces and phases…it’s not a one size fits all journey, but it’s important to our wellness as Black women, to embark on this journey, for ourselves, for our children, and for our community.
Blackdoctor.org has offered 5 ways that people can start stepping into their soft era.
Slow down, life is not a race. Slowing down will allow you to breathe better and handle situations with a clearer mind.
Rest. Slowing down includes stopping fully and resting. Sleep more, relax more, and be comfortable with doing nothing every once in a while.
Eat better. Health is wealth, and you already know eating healthier and being more mindful of what you consume will make you feel better.
Say no. It’s okay to put yourself first and say no. If it’s something you do not want to do for someone else, then say no. If someone is treating you poorly and you don’t like it, say no and if they continue, remove them, choose you.
Be a damsel in distress. Black women: ASK FOR HELP or ACCEPT HELP WHEN IT’S BEING OFFERED. You cannot do everything, allow someone else to step in so you can take a step back.
Check out our latest episode Bloggers & Fiends Podcast where we talk about this further. Click on the link below to join the discussion.
Let’s get into it y’all!